


The Mistletoe Tango

by snapealina



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-29
Updated: 2015-12-29
Packaged: 2018-05-10 04:54:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,883
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5571810
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snapealina/pseuds/snapealina
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Severus has to deliver some potions to a certain mischievous colleague.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Mistletoe Tango

**Author's Note:**

> Written in 2011 for the Snupin Santa.   
> Gift fic for starstruck1986.  
> Characters belong to JK Rowling.

Severus grumbled as he found his way through the corridors. Didn't they have House-Elves for this kind of job? So what if he had been the one who made the potions. Why did _he_ have to be the one to deliver them?  
  
Severus was never one to dawdle, but tonight he really took his time walking through the castle corridors. Angrily, he hexed one of the suits of armour that jumped in front of him singing "Jingle spells, jingle spells, jingle all the way."  
  
"Oh, show some Christmas spirit, Severus," Dumbledore had said. "One of your colleagues is in great pain and would without doubt appreciate the gesture."  
  
Severus knew the colleague in question would _indeed_ appreciate it, and that was partly why he didn't want to do this. Ever since Remus Lupin had set foot in the castle, he had tried to befriend Severus, obviously to taunt him. With two dead and one locked up in Azkaban, Lupin had apparently taken it upon himself to carry on the legacy of the annoying group. Severus, on the other hand, had no intentions of befriending the infuriating werewolf and had avoided Lupin's chambers the best he could.  
  
Once a month, he had to deliver the Wolfsbane potion, only because he didn't trust the House-Elves to remember all the instructions, and he wanted to be sure Lupin knew everything. Merlin only knew what would happen if Lupin didn't do it right. That delivery was usually done during the day, when they were both busy and the chance of being interrupted was high.  
  
However, this was at night, and also the Christmas holidays. The castle was almost empty, and the chance of a disturbance was at best, slim.  
  
As Severus approached Lupin's chambers, he actually found himself wishing he'd run into Potter or one of the Weasleys. Any excuse to get out of the delivery would be very welcome right now. Dumbledore knew how uncomfortable he was in Lupin's presence; why had he insisted that he do this?  
  
Reluctantly, he knocked on Lupin's door.  
  
"Come in," came a sing-song voice and Severus opened the door.  
  
On the floor was Remus Lupin dressed in nothing but a pair of ragged, dark blue pyjama bottoms. He was on his back, showing off his upper body in a way that made Severus more than uncomfortable.   
  
Lupin, on the other hand, looked almost too comfortable as he lay there grinning like a mad-man, staring at the ceiling. Above him were at least a dozen tiny Father Christmases swirling around, and Lupin was pointing his wand, creating even more of them.  
  
"Severus!" Lupin beamed as he saw who was standing in the doorway. "It's so nice to see you! Have you come to join the Christmas party? I'm trying to get them to dance, but they won't cooperate with me. Maybe _you_ can get them to dance?"  
  
"The Headmaster said you were in need of some healing potions, but it doesn't look like you're in much pain after all," said Severus dryly and held up the two vials.  
  
"Pain?" asked Lupin confused. "Why would I be in pain?"  
  
Severus sighed. "Just off the top of my head, your transformation, perhaps?"  
  
"Oh _that_?" said Lupin. "That's nothing half a bottle of Firewhiskey and some self-healing spells can't take care of."  
  
"You should know better than to mix those two, Lupin."  
  
"Don't be silly, Severus. I'm perfectly fine!" Lupin insisted. "Now come and join the party!" Lupin turned his attention to the swirling Santas above him. "I was a bit lonely, so I conjured some friends. I didn't expect so many to turn up, though. And they seem to be bringing friends too." Lupin waved his wand at the creatures. "Now why won't you dance?"  
  
The creatures didn't dance, but Lupin made one of them explode into four new ones.  
  
"Lupin, you are drunk!" Severus said and stepped into the room and closed the door.  
  
"Yes, sir, I am!" chuckled Lupin.  
  
"Then you shouldn't do magic!" Severus stated and rolled his eyes. "You should drink these," he waved the vials in front of him, "but I would recommend a sobriety potion first. I can send one up with a House-Elf."  
  
"Thank you, Severus," said Lupin and tried to sit up from this spot on the floor. He only managed to get halfway into a sitting position before he collapsed. "That was odd. If I could only get up off this floor."  
  
He grabbed one of the Santas, making it shriek in fear. "You!" Lupin shouted. "Help me up!"  
  
Severus' palm met his forehead with a slap loud enough to wake a whole History of Magic class in the middle of a double lesson on the Goblin rebellions. He watched Lupin struggle with the creature and was about to leave the vials on the floor when the Santa flew, with great speed, right past him, missing his prominent nose by an inch.  
  
"Oh, you're no use," Lupin called after the creature, which zoomed out of the room and down the corridor, swearing in a squeaky, high-pitched voice. "Severus," Lupin looked at the Potions Master with begging eyes. "Can you help me up?"  
  
"You got yourself into this mess, you can surely get out of it on your own," said Severus. He really wanted to get out of there as soon as possible.  
  
"Please," Lupin begged. "It will only take you a few seconds."  
  
Severus sighed, "Fine," and the werewolf's face turned into a mischievous smile.  
  
Sceptically, Severus put the vials in his pocket and approached the man on the floor. He bent down, put Lupin's arm around his neck and hoisted him up.  
  
When they were finally standing, a cluster of _pops_ sounded above them and out of nowhere Lupin kissed him on the cheek.  
  
"Lupin!" he yelled. "What the hell did you just do?"  
  
Lupin giggled like a little girl and said. "Oh, would you look at that? Mistletoe. Happy Christmas, Severus."  
  
Severus looked up. All the tiny creatures had disappeared and above their heads was a sea of mistletoe. He looked at the drunk and shirtless werewolf who grinned widely.   
  
"That's it," said Severus. "You're on your own!"  
  
He was about to let go of Lupin, but the man clung to him like his life was depending on it. "No, please, Severus, don't let go," he begged. "I really need to get to my bed, and I can't move on my own."  
  
"Fine," hissed Severus. "Just don't kiss me again!"  
  
"But it's mistletoe," said Lupin. "We _must_ kiss if we get under one."  
  
"Nonsense," huffed Severus.  
  
"No, really! It's the law! Or something."  
  
"I highly doubt that, Lupin," said Severus. Lupin was beginning to sag towards the floor, so Severus hoisted him up again.  
  
"I swear, Severus! If we get caught under mistletoe, we have to kiss."  
  
"And what, exactly, would happen if I refuse?"  
  
"I don't dare to think about it." Lupin said in a deep voice, before bursting out laughing again.  
  
Severus rolled his eyes and started moving towards Lupin's bed. Suddenly, the man kissed him again, this time dangerously close to his lips.  
  
"Lupin, I'm warning you! I'm letting you fall and leave you on the floor if you do that again."  
  
"But it was the mistletoe," said Lupin with a huge grin.  
  
"I don't care _why_ ," sneered Severus. "Don't. Do it. Again!"  
  
"Don't walk under the mistletoe then."  
  
"That's a bit hard considering the ceiling is full of them." Severus grabbed his wand with one hand, struggling to keep Lupin up with the other. "Finite Incantatem."  
  
Nothing happened, and the werewolf began to chuckle. "It's a sign, Severus. Merlin is determined for you to have a happy Christmas too."  
  
"Merlin has nothing to do with this, Lupin. This is all your work. Make it stop!"  
  
"No!"  
  
"Lupin!"  
  
"No!"  
  
Severus looked up, the ceiling was almost packed with green leaves and white berries. Leaving Lupin on the floor would be the easiest solution, but who knew what he would do next if Severus were to bail? Besides, he would never hear the end of it if he'd left Lupin in this state.  
  
 _"I had expected more from you, Severus,"_ he could hear Dumbledore inside his head.  
  
He would just have to find a mistletoe-free route to Lupin's bed. Damn those Anti-Apparition spells and why the hell hadn't he just left Lupin on the floor before this madness started. Being stuck carrying a half-naked werewolf wasn't exactly his plan for the evening.  
  
Severus looked up and thought hard. There were some spots where he could actually see the ceiling, but it would take a lot of good planning. If they walked three steps to the right, then turned sideways and walked towards the bed with tiny mouse steps, that would get them well on the way. That shouldn't be too hard.  
  
"Ok, Lupin!" he said. "Let's do this!"  
  
Carefully, and extremely slowly, he walked to the right, dragging Lupin with him. Just as they were about to reach the point where they'd have to turn sideways, Lupin tripped and knocked them both off course. Lupin fell to the floor, and Severus helped him up quickly.  
  
"Oops," Remus chuckled and kissed him fully on the lips this time.  
  
"Stop doing that!" Severus hissed and pushed Lupin away, but he could feel his face flush.  
  
"I can't!" Remus said. "It's mistletoe, I have to do it."  
  
"No, you do _not_!" Severus growled. "It's just a bloody twig. You don't have to kiss me just because there's mistletoe above our heads."  
  
"But I do," said Remus. "Just try."  
  
"What do you mean?" asked Severus.  
  
"Walk under the mistletoe and then try to move on without kissing me."  
  
"Fine by me," Severus said and dragged them both towards the bed. They only made it two steps before they hit an invisible wall.  
  
"What in the name of Salazar Slytherin is this?" Severus used the hand not currently supporting Lupin to feel around. It was some sort of barrier in front of them. Severus turned carefully without letting go of the drunk man at his side and found that they were surrounded by the wall.  
  
"I told you," grinned Lupin. "We can only get out of here if you kiss me."  
  
"Lupin, what have you done? I will not kiss you!"  
  
"Then we will be trapped here forever."   
  
"Hell no!" Severus put Lupin down gently and began to fire spells at the invisible wall.   
  
Lupin merely sat on the floor laughing heartily. "It won't work."  
  
After several attempts to break through the barrier, Severus had to admit that he did not know how to get out of this. How could this have happened? How could he be trapped in a invisible room with a randy, drunk, shirtless werewolf? He was just delivering some potions for Merlin's sake.  
  
"Kiss me, Severus," Lupin puckered his lips and closed his eyes waiting for Severus to kneel down and kiss him.  
  
"I'd rather eat whatever comes out of Hagrid's creatures." Severus sneered.  
  
"Just kiss me so we can both go to bed, Severus." Lupin insisted.  
  
"Never!"  
  
Remus yawned. "Well, thankfully I'm capable of sleeping anywhere. Wake me when you've figured it out, Severus." Mere seconds later, Severus heard light snoring coming from the floor.   
  
If anyone had come into the room it would have been a very strange sight that would have met them. In the middle of the room, Severus was standing with his wand out and a frown on his face, trying to figure out how to get out of there. Lupin was asleep half-sitting, half-leaning against an invisible wall.  
  
It took Severus almost half an hour to pick up the courage to do what he was about to do.  
  
"Lupin, wake up!"  
  
Remus snored loudly and opened his eyes. "Ready to kiss me yet?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
The words seemed to wake Lupin up properly, because his eyes flew open and a wide smile spread across his face.  
  
"Don't look too happy about this." Severus said. "A peck on the cheek is enough, right?"  
  
"No," said Remus. "It has to be a full-blown kiss. _With_ tongue."  
  
"What? But you kissed me on the cheek the first time." Severus said as he helped the man up.  
  
"Did I?" Remus asked. "That was stupid of me!"  
  
Severus had no idea what the werewolf was talking about and kissed him quickly on the cheek. He felt around for the wall. It had disappeared. Severus smiled.  
  
"Shit," said Lupin. "That was way too easy."   
  
Severus looked at the ceiling again. He would have to plan a completely different route now. A big step to the left would get them to a mistletoe-free area, then he could see a zig-zag pattern of vacant spots. After that, he would just have to improvise. Severus spent so long staring at the ceiling he didn't notice Lupin taking his wand out and pointing it at the ceiling. Some of the mistletoe disappeared and he looked at him with amazement. This would ease the task immensely.  
  
"Wow, thank you, Lupin."  
  
"No problem, Severus." Remus grinned. "I'm sorry, I couldn't get rid of them all."  
  
The planned route was still the best way to go right now, and Severus took a big step to the left and dragged Lupin with him. Then, they zigzagged forward a couple of inches at the time before they stopped.   
  
"Now, where to go next?" Severus asked himself.  
  
"This way," said Remus and pushed him to the left placing them both under mistletoe again.  
  
"I'm this close to hexing your balls off, Lupin." Severus hissed.  
  
"Oh, you wouldn't want that. We can have a lot of fun playing with those balls."   
  
"Very funny, Lupin," Severus sneered, but kissed him quickly on the cheek. "Now let's move on!"  
  
He took a step forwards towards a vacant spot, but walked straight into a wall again.  
  
"What the -?"  
  
Lupin chuckled.  
  
"But I just kissed you." Severus said confused.   
  
"Not on the mouth." Remus grinned.  
  
"You said the cheek was enough," said Severus.  
  
"You said the cheek was enough, I didn't agree."   
  
"What?"  
  
"I fixed it," said Remus proudly.  
  
"You weren't able to make some stupid flying creatures dance, but you managed a complicated spell like _this_?"  
  
"I didn't have the proper will or inspiration back then," Remus chuckled.  
  
"What inspiration?"  
  
Remus threw his arms around him. "You, of course. Which would you prefer? A dancing Santa or a kiss from a sexy wizard?"  
  
"I guess I can learn to like dancing," Severus scowled and Lupin laughed.  
  
"Now, come on my knight in shining – er … black robes. Kiss me so we can get to bed." Lupin winked at him and Severus knew that he had no choice.   
  
He took a deep breath, grabbed Lupin's face, closed his eyes and quickly pressed his lips to the werewolf's.  
  
"Now that's more like it," grinned Lupin.  
  
Severus looked at the ceiling again, if he was really careful and Lupin didn't push him off course, he would be able to get to the bed mistletoe-free. It would involve a lot of zig-zagging and a lot of luck, but it wasn't impossible.  
  
However, there was a short cut, but that involved getting kissed by Lupin twice before they reached the bed.   
  
Severus looked at the route and weighed his options. The chance of him getting Lupin to the bed without getting kissed was slim to none considering the werewolf had knocked him off course every time he had a route planned. Maybe it was better to take matters into his own hands (and lips)? He could surely survive two more kisses.  
  
He grabbed the werewolf firmly and steered him carefully forwards on the path of mistletoe free ceiling, they had almost made it to the spot where Severus had to make his definite choice when he felt the man trying to drag him to the left.  
  
This time, however, Severus was prepared for it and managed to stand his ground. "Nice try, Lupin," he sneered and pulled him to the spot where he intended them to stop.   
  
Lupin moaned. "Damn it!"  
  
Severus braced himself. It was now or never, and he ought to make it a good one so he could distract Lupin long enough to make it to the next vacant spot.  
  
He took a deep breath and pushed the unaware wizard towards the bed. Lupin stumbled and fell to the floor right under a big branch of mistletoe. Severus pulled him up and kissed him before the man had gotten his head around what just happened.  
  
The kiss lasted for several seconds, and Severus could feel the werewolf loosen his grip on his arm. He held on more tightly so Lupin wouldn't fall to the floor. That could cost him a lot of valuable time. Finally he pulled away and Lupin's expression was completely blank. He never knew what hit him.  
  
Severus dragged them to a vacant spot even closer to the bed.  
  
"Why, Severus," Lupin finally came to his senses and blushed. "Some might think you actually did that on purpose."  
  
"Some people would think so many things, Lupin," Severus said and pushed him to the right, landing under the mistletoe again.  
  
"Again?" Lupin beamed. "This must be my lucky day."  
  
"Shut up," said Severus and was about to kiss the man, but this time Lupin beat him to it.   
  
Lupin grabbed his face and held it firmly. He pressed his lips gently to Severus' for a few seconds before he started sucking lightly on Severus' upper lip. Severus tried to withdraw his head, but Lupin's grip was so determined he couldn't do it. Lupin moved on to his bottom lip, nibbling on it. His right hand found the back of Severus' head and Severus felt Lupin's fingers run through his hair.   
  
Lupin moaned and Severus felt his tongue asking for access. Funnily enough, he accepted and parted his lips.   
  
Whatever happened next was a bit blurry to Severus, but Lupin did things with his tongue Severus would never have thought of doing. A tiny sound escaped his lips as Lupin let go of his head and pulled out of the kiss, but Severus refused to believe it was a moan. Lupin did _not_ just make him moan!  
  
When Severus finally came to his senses, he realised that they were standing right next to the bed; he had reached his goal. With a last push, Lupin landed on top of the duvet.  
  
"Finally!" Severus sighed with relief.   
  
Lupin crawled in and grabbed his pillow. He lay there hugging it as he sighed and smiled.   
  
"You've had your fun! Now sleep it off!"  
  
"Thank you, Severus," Remus mumbled with his eyes closed.   
  
"The potions are on your table. I'll send a House-Elf down with a sobriety potion and then I would drink the other two as soon as possible to get rid of the pain.”  
  
"What pain?"   
  
"The pain you will feel as soon as you sober up," said Severus and turned to leave. "Or if you try to move, if you already forgot that, " he added.   
  
Severus started to walk towards the exit when he heard Lupin speak again.  
  
"You know, I've been wanting to kiss you since fifth year. I'm sorry for playing the mistletoe trick on you. I just had to know what it would be like."  
  
This confession made Severus stop and turn. "Shut up, Lupin. You're drunk!"  
  
"But everyone knows that drunk people are telling the truth, Severus. It's just easier to admit things after a few shots."  
  
"I don't believe you, Lupin," Severus sneered.   
  
Still, there was something in the way Lupin said this, made Severus stop and think. "Why?" he asked.  
  
"Why did I play the trick?" Remus asked.  
  
"No, the other."  
  
"Why did I want to kiss you?"  
  
"That's the one."  
  
"Because I've always found you fascinating."  
  
Severus let out a loud "HAH".  
  
"I've always liked dark and mysterious," said Lupin. "And brains. I like a guy with something between his ears. "  
  
"Get some sleep, Lupin," said Severus and started walking towards the door.  
  
"You know, it wasn't exactly easy being a werewolf, but what was even worse was being the only gay kid at Hogwarts, "Lupin continued and Severus stopped again.  
  
"You may be a werewolf, but you were most certainly _not_ the only gay kid at Hogwarts, Lupin. I can't count the times I walked in on my roommates," he snorted.   
  
Remus' eyes were wide open.   
  
"None of them would ever admit it, of course, but everyone knew that few cared who they slept with or who sucked them off."  
  
"As long as it wasn't a Gryffindor, right?"  
  
"Hufflepuffs were in the same category, but yes, that's pretty much accurate."  
  
"What about you?" Lupin asked. "Did you ever join in?"  
  
"Never."  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"The idea never appealed to me."  
  
"Getting your cock sucked never appealed to you? What's wrong with you?"  
  
Severus rolled his eyes. "Very funny, Lupin."  
  
"Oh, getting your cock sucked by a _bloke_ never appealed to you."   
  
"Getting sucked by _them_ never appealed to me."  
  
"So who did you want to do it?"  
  
"I'm not telling you!"  
  
"Was it Lily?"  
  
Severus didn't answer.  
  
"Or that blonde Ravenclaw girl, what was her name? Perkins! Or Narcissa Black? At least tell me which house she was in."  
  
"Who said it was a _she_?"  
  
Remus gasped. "Severus! I didn't know you were -"  
  
"It was none of your business, why would you?"  
  
"But you said that you never wanted your roommates to -"  
  
"I might prefer men, but I'm not a slut, Lupin."  
  
"I never said you were."  
  
The two men fell silent for a while, before Remus suddenly asked.  
  
"So did you ever get to kiss him?"  
  
"I did," answered Severus. "Not quite under the circumstances I thought I would, but yes, I did."  
  
"That's good," said Remus and smiled. "Did it live up to your expectations?"  
  
"Exceeded expectations," said Severus and found himself walking towards Lupin again.   
  
Remus saw this and sat up, looking oddly at Severus who suddenly sat down on the side of the bed.  
  
"I thought you were going to get me a potion," said Remus confused.  
  
"I thought so too," mumbled Severus and looked at him. "If I give you the sobriety potion, will you still tell me the same story you just did?"  
  
"Absolutely!" Remus said truthfully.  
  
"And you have not done this just to mock me?"  
  
"Mock you?"  
  
"Like you've been doing all year with your over enthusiastic friendliness. Don't think I haven't noticed what you've been up to, Lupin."  
  
"I've wanted to be your friend, Severus."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"As I've said, I've always found you fascinating, and I thought it was high time that you and I buried the past and moved on."  
  
"Because your friends aren't here and you needed a new one?" Severus sneered.  
  
"Because I like _you_ and I enjoy being around you."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"I just do, Severus. Why can't you accept that?"  
  
Severus fell silent again and looked at Lupin.  
  
"If I'd only had the mistletoe," sighed Lupin. "I could have proved how much I wanted you."  
  
"Oh, would you look at that?" Severus pointed his wand at the ceiling and a mistletoe popped out. Lupin gaped.   
  
"Severus?"  
  
"Happy Christmas, Lupin," said Severus. "Now didn't you have something to prove?"


End file.
